Chapter 4 - Vol 2

Chapter 4
The following day, we once again reluctantly waited in front of the station. This time, however,
instead of the three SOS Brigade members, I found myself standing alongside some new faces.
The so-called "minion characters" that Haruhi had called for,
"Hey, Kyon, this is different from what you told us,"
Taniguchi protested and said,
"Where's the beautiful Asahina-san? We only came because you said she would come pick us
up! But I don't see her anywhere."
Sure enough, it's already past the appointed time and Asahina-san has yet to arrive. She's
probably hiding in her house wanting to skip class today, after going through so much during the
past two days.
"I only came so that I could satiate my visual appetite, but what is this? So far all I've seen is
Suzumiya looking pissed. This is a rip off!"
Stop complaining! Why don't you observe Nagato as well then?
"Now that you mention it, Nagato-san's costume sure suits her."
This was Kunikida speaking casually, as he was chosen as minion number two after Taniguchi.
Haruhi had called me on the phone last night while I was taking a shower. Taking the phone
receiver my sister handed to me, I washed my hair as I heard her saying over the phone,
"That idiot Taniguchi and that other guy…. I can't remember his name… Anyways, they're your
friends. Bring those two over tomorrow. I want to use them as minions."
After saying that, she promptly hung up. You should at least say "Hi!" When making requests
you should ask people in a polite way, not order people around! Just like how Asahina-san
makes her requests.
I didn't know what plans Taniguchi and Kunikida had for their vacation, so I called their cell
phones after my shower. The two extras with a lot of free time agreed to come right away. Just
what do they do on their holidays anyway?
Maybe she thought two guys weren't enough, because Haruhi brought another extra. This extra
bent forward as though she was bowing and examined Nagato, whose eyes were covered by her
wide-rimmed hat. She hung her very long hair and smiled at me,
"Kyon-kun, how's Mikuru?"
Tsuruya is this energetic girl's name, who happens to be Asahina-san's classmate. According to
Asahina-san, she’s… "A friend I've met in this age", so I guess there shouldn't be anything queer
about her. Back in June, when Haruhi wanted to enter the baseball tournament, Asahina-san
brought this second year schoolgirl to help make up the numbers. Oh yeah, Taniguchi and
Kunikida were there as well, and even my sister came.
Tsuruya-san generously revealed her shining white teeth and said,
"So what are we doing today? She told me to come over if I had time, so I came. What's that
armband on Suzumiya-san's arm about? What's that handheld camera for? And what's with
Yuki's costume?"
She bombarded me with question after question. Just as I was about to answer her, Tsuruya-san
had already walked off towards Koizumi,
"Wow, Itsuki-kun! You look awesome as usual today!"
She sure is a busy person.
Haruhi was just as energetic, as she shouted in a deafening tone towards her cell phone early in
the morning,
"What!? You're the protagonist! 30% of the success of this movie depends on you! Of course,
I'm responsible for the remaining 70%, but that doesn't matter! What'd you say? A stomachache?
Stop kidding me! Only an elementary school kid would use such an excuse! I give you thirty
seconds to come here at once!"
It seems Asahina-san has begun to lock herself in, like a hikkikomori. When she realized she had
to go through the same thing again today, it's only natural for her to suffer a mentally induced
stomachache. She is a faint-hearted person, after all.
She bombarded me with question after question. Just as I was about to answer her, Tsuruya-san had
already walked off towards Koizumi...
"Really!"
Haruhi furiously hung up her phone, then revealed a menacing glare that looked like that of a
butler about to scold a child who doesn't know her table manners,
"She deserves some punishment!"
You shouldn't be saying that. Asahina-san isn't like you. She only wants to live her life
peacefully, or at least take a break on Sunday when there's no school. Even I too thought so.
Of course, Haruhi wasn't going to allow the female lead to go AWOL. The director who
demanded so much from the lead actress without even paying her anything said,
"I'll go fetch her. Lend me that bag for now."
Haruhi snatched the bag containing the clothes and rushed straight towards the taxi stand. She
then knocked on the window of the taxi parked in front, had the driver open the door, and after
she quickly dove into the car, the taxi drove off immediately.
Now that I think about it, I don't even know where Asahina-san lives, though I've been to
Nagato's place many times...
"I can understand how Asahina-san feels."
Without my even noticing, Koizumi was standing by my side and talking to me.
Tsuruya-san now greeted the two bozos from my class non-stop and said, "Yo, long time no
see!" Koizumi smiled at the sight, then said,
"I have a feeling she really will become a transforming magical girl if things continue going the
way they are now. After all, she's even fired laser beams. It's getting ridiculous already."
"What can be more ridiculous than this?"
"You're right. If she were told to spit fire from her mouth, it wouldn't be too hard to train..."
Asahina-san isn't a monster. Neither is she a circus performer, or even some evil wrestler.
What'll happen if she burns those cute lips of hers? Who's going to be responsible for that? Don't
tell me you're going to take responsibility.
"No, if there were something that I have to be responsible for, it would be standing by idly until
the 'Avatars' begin to wreak havoc. Fortunately, things still haven't deteriorated to such a level...
That has only happened once, I believe. I'm really grateful of you back then. Thanks to you, the
disaster was averted and contained."
About half a year ago, the world was nearly destroyed thanks to Haruhi. It was thanks to my hard
work and mental exhaustion that mankind was able to survive. I felt it wouldn't be too much if all
the heads of state around the world were to give me a thank you letter. So far I have yet to be
visited by any foreign diplomatic envoy. Sigh, on the other hand, even if they had come they
would have only increased my woes, so I didn't expect them to come. The only reward I received
was being embraced by a teary-eyed Asahina-san, yet when I think about it, that’s more than
enough for me. So I didn't feel any gladness at being thanked by Koizumi.
"As for that Mikuru Be..."
Stop calling her by her first name; it pisses me off.
"I'm sorry. Right now we should be able to prevent Asahina-san from firing anymore strange
beams."
How did you do it? Should you be this optimistic just because Haruhi didn't bring any colored
contact lens this time?
"No, we've eliminated that factor already. I asked Nagato-san to help out a bit."
I turned my gaze towards the girl who was standing still and staring at the shops in front of the
station, and then looked back at Koizumi again,
"What did you do to Asahina-san?"
"Don't be so nervous, we merely removed her ability to fire lasers. I'm not too sure how, as
unlike the other TFEI interfaces, Nagato-san wouldn't say anything. I only asked her to reduce
the threat posed by Asahina-san to zero."
"What on earth is a TFEI?"
"It's just an abbreviation we use amongst ourselves, you don't have to know what it stands for. I
feel that Nagato-san is the most outstanding one among all of 'them'. I've been wondering, what
else is she responsible for besides being a simple communication interface?"
What he meant was - What else does this silent girl that loves reading do besides observing
Haruhi? Some people still find it a pity that Asakura Ryouko had disappeared, though personally
I don't feel sad at all.
About thirty minutes later, the taxi carrying Haruhi had returned, also inside was Asahina-san
wearing her waitress costume. Like yesterday, she still looked very gloomy. Haruhi asked the
driver for a receipt, she probably wanted reimbursements for her expenses.
Taniguchi and Kunikida looked at them and muttered,
"One night when coming home from the convenience store, I came across a taxi,"
"And?"
"And instead of a 'For Hire' lamp on top, I saw that the taxi lamp read 'Love Car'."
"You must’ve been surprised?"
"Before I could confirm, the taxi had driven off. It was then that I realized, isn't love what I'm
lacking right now?"
"Did that taxi really have a 'Love Car' lamp on it? That must've been some custom made taxi."
I can't help but be amazed by the conversation made by these two idiots, and I had a feeling that
the shortage of talent was becoming very serious. If Taniguchi and Kunikida were nickle alloys,
then Tsuruya-san would be platinum. Their difference would be between that of a firework and
the Apollo 11 spacecraft.
"Ah, Mikuru has come by taxi! Eh? Who are you?"
Tsuruya-san's pitch was very high, her slightly medium-high pitch voice was probably just a
pitch lower than Haruhi's abnormally high natural pitch. Though Tsuruya-san should be within
the bounds of the normal world.
"Wow! You're so sexy! Where does Mikuru work at? Don't you have to be at least eighteen?
Huh? Aren't you just seventeen? Oh, don't worry, since we're not customers anyway."
Asahina-san's teary eyes now reveal their natural colors, it seems there's a shortage of colored
contact lens.
Haruhi now dragged the tiny waitress out of the car,
"What do you mean sick? I won't let you use such an excuse! We're going to continue filming!
Next would be the exciting scenes of Mikuru-chan! This is all for the SOS Brigade! No matter
what age they are, the audience will always be moved by acts of self-sacrifice!"
Then go sacrifice yourself!
"In this world, there's only one female protagonist. To be honest, I'd like to be that person, but
this time I've generously allowed you to play that role, at least until the school festival ends!"
In this world, no one would acknowledge you as a female protagonist!
Tsuruya-san clapped her hands against Asahina-san's shoulders, causing her to cough frantically.
"What's this costume? A racing girl? What role are you playing? That's it! You can wear that at
the fried noodle shop during the school festival! I'm sure that it'll attract lots of customers!"
I really do understand Asahina-san’s wanting to become a hermit. When faced with continuously
fierce attacks, no one is going to stand on the pitcher's mound and be the pitcher.
Asahina-san slowly lifted her head, then with the look of someone about to die for her religion,
she looked at me as though begging for help, and then looked away. She slowly breathed a soft
sigh, but she still managed to give a weak smile and walk in strides towards me.
"Sorry I'm late."
I looked at the top of Asahina-san's head, which was lowered down, and said,
"It's alright, I don't really mind."
"I'll treat you to lunch..."
"There's no need to, don't worry about it."
"I'm so sorry about yesterday, it seems like I unexpectedly fired an optical weapon..."
"It's fine, I'm not hurt anyway..."
I took a peek at my surroundings. Nagato stood while staring blankly and holding her staff with a
star attached to its end. Asahina-san looked at me, lowered her already soft voice and said,
"I was bitten."
She rubbed her left wrist.
"Bitten by what?"
"By Nagato-san. I heard it was for the injection of some nanomachines... But, my eyes don't
seem to be able to fire anything anymore, so I'm relieved."
Thanks to this, I don't have to worry about being sliced into pieces... Right? Speaking of which, I
find the sight of Nagato biting Asahina-san rather hard to visualize. What did she inject?
"It was yesterday night, when she came with Koizumi-kun to my place..."
Koizumi, who was in charge of looking after the equipment, was now talking to Haruhi. I would
have wanted to go last night! He should have asked me to come along! Paying Asahina-san a
visit was definitely more fun than being tricked into a Sealed Dimension.
"What are you two chatting about?"
Tsuruya-san wrapped her small soft arm around Asahina-san's neck,
"Mikuru, you're so cute! How I want to keep you as a pet! Kyon-kun, do you two get along
well?"
Now really…
The two bozos Taniguchi and Kunikida were now looking at Asahina-san with their mouths wide
open. Hey, stop looking! What are you going to do if she loses a piece of her costume? As I was
thinking this, Haruhi yelled,
"The place has been decided!"
What place?
"For outdoor shooting!"
Is that so? I keep forgetting that we're making a movie. I don't know why, I just wanted to forget
about it. Also, for some reason, I can't help but feel that this is the filming location for some lowcost
pop-idol DVD.
"There's a huge pond near Koizumi-kun's place, so let's begin our filming there today!"
In almost the blink of an eye, Haruhi quickly picked up a plastic flag that read "filming cast and
crew" and led the way forward.
I called over Taniguchi and Kunikida; who were still staring at Asahina-san with their dirty,
staring eyes, and generously shared the bags and equipment that I carried with them.
We walked for about thirty minutes before coming to the side of a pond. The location was
somewhere in the middle of the hill, which was basically right at the center of the residential
district. While it might be called a pond, it’s a pretty massive body of water. So big that
migratory birds would probably come flocking over during winter. According to Koizumi, the
ducks and swallows should be flying in anytime soon.
The pond was surrounded by a metal fence, which pretty much tells people not to trespass. That's
common knowledge, isn't it? Maybe it has to do with how a person is brought up. Lately, even
elementary school kids won't play around here, except for those who are mentally insane.
"What're you waiting for? Hurry up and climb over!"
I'd forgotten that Haruhi is, in fact, a seriously insane person; as she placed her foot over the
fence and waved her hand. Asahina-san placed her hands on her extremely short skirt and
seemed to become very despairing. Tsuruya-san stood beside and giggled,
"Huh? What did we come here for? Hey! Is Mikuru going to swim?"
Asahina-san shook her head very quickly, sighed, and stared at the green pond surface as though
she'd just seen blood.
"Don't you think this fence is a bit too tall for us to climb over?"
Koizumi wasn't talking to me, but to Nagato. You're wasting your time trying to start a proper
conversation with her. She’ll either give you a simple "yes" or "no" answer, or she’ll begin a
string of incomprehensible jargon.
"..."
Though Nagato remained silent, she had a peculiar reaction. She placed her finger on the top of
the fence and slowly pulled it outwards. For some reason, the metallic fence, which was
supposed to be firmly stuck to the ground, now bent softly like toffee placed under the sun, and
then it slowly coagulated in its bent form.
She was as elegant as usual. I frantically turned and looked at the others' reactions, perhaps I was
worrying too much.
"Huh? This fence looks quite old."
Kunikida said as though he knew everything.
"Just what am I playing? She can't have me play a kappa…"
Taniguchi mumbled as he walked through the opening caused by the bent fence and on towards
the pond.
Tsuruya-san followed behind him, holding hands with Asahina-san, who was reluctantly led
towards the pond where Haruhi was waiting.
I'm so relieved that the extra trio didn't have that much intelligence.
Koizumi smiled at me and Nagato, then slid his body through the fence opening, while Nagato,
the black mage, also walked past me like a phantom.
Oh well, let's hurry up and get this over with! Before anyone discovers that public property has
been vandalized, that is.
Asahina-san and Nagato stood facing each other again, looks like it's yet another battle scene. I
really wonder whether Haruhi had even seriously written the script. When is Koizumi going to
come on? Still wearing his school uniform today, Koizumi stood behind me and continued his
role as the reflector board holder.
Haruhi placed the director's chair on the dirt and scribbled what might be the dialogue in her
sketchbook.
"This scene will show Mikuru being forced into a desperate situation, with her blue eye beams
having been nullified."
Haruhi stopped writing with her pen and smiled, looking satisfied.
"Yes, this'll do. You there, hold this and stand over there."
And so, Taniguchi was put in charge of holding up the dialogue placards. The two actresses
began reading the placards held up by an obviously disgruntled Taniguchi:
"I won't be deterred by this set back! Y-you evil alien Yuki! H-h-hurry up and leave Earth at
once...! Umm... Sorry..."
Asahina-san couldn't help but apologize for no reason after reading her lines, Nagato Yuki the
evil alien magician then said,
"...Is that so?"
She nonchalantly nodded her head and read her lines following Haruhi's instructions,
"You should be the one to disappear from this time period. He is ours. That is how much he is
worth to us. Though he has not discovered his powers yet, those are very precious powers. We
will need those powers in order to invade Earth."
Moving in tandem with Haruhi waving her loudspeaker, Nagato waved her star-shaped wand and
pointed it towards Asahina-san's face.
"I-I-I won't let you have your way! Even if it means risking my life."
"If that is so, then prepare to die."
"Cut!" Haruhi yelled and stood up, she then ran between the two of them and said,
"You girls need to create an atmosphere! Yes, the sort of atmosphere like now, but don't stray
from the script. And Mikuru-chan, come over here."
The director and female lead abandoned us and turned away. I put down my camera and
scratched my neck. Just what were they discussing?
Tsuruya-san could take it no more and began to laugh out loud,
"What kind of movie is this? Can this even be called a movie? Nyahahaha! This is too funny!"
Besides you, I guess only Haruhi would find this funny.
Taniguchi and Kunikida stood aimlessly with a "What the hell were we called here for?"
expression. Nagato stood by the side, as though she had nothing to do with it. While Koizumi
stood naturally and looked at the edge of the pond. I took out the tape, which was nearly full, and
replaced it with a new tape. I had the feeling that I was creating useless trash.
Tsuruya-san looked at the equipment I was carrying with interest,
"Hmm, is this what they use to make videos these days? It's full of Mikuru's funny images, right?
Can I please have a look at them later? I think it'll be pretty funny."
It's nothing funny, really. Handing out flyers dressed as a bunny girl took only a day, though this
ridiculously hilarious movie would last until the day before the school festival. We could go
from skipping classes to skipping school altogether. This would be very bothersome for me,
since I wouldn't be able to drink any fine tea. Nagato's tea would be tasteless, while Haruhi's tea
would be bitter due to the laws of physics. Leaving Koizumi's tea aside, if I have to end up
brewing tea for myself, then I'd rather drink tap water.
"Sorry to keep you guys waiting!"
Indeed, we have waited for quite some time. About time you returned, because I don't want to
ruin the nice natural scenery by the pond anymore.
"The real climax is about to start, look carefully guys!"
Haruhi pushed Asahina-san forward. Even if you didn't ask, I would look at her every day with
my eyes wide open anyway! See? As usual, Asahina-san looks just as cute, pretty and...
"Huh?"
The color of one of her eyes has changed, this time it's the right eye. The silver-colored eye
looked at me apologetically and moved between me and the ground below.
"Now, Mikuru-chan, fire your amazing Mikuru Beam R and shoot out some incredible stuff or
whatever, just attack!"
There was no way I could stop this in time, and even if I could, I would have already been sliced
into pieces. By the way, this happened all too suddenly, Haruhi giving her terrible command,
Asahina-san blinking her eyes looking horrified, and...
Nagato pushed Asahina-san down by the side of pond; the appearance of her black silhouette
was just too sudden.
Yesterday's scene was repeated again today, it was like watching a tape recording all over.
Nagato showed off her amazing instantaneous movement skills.
In an instant, only her hat remained where she had once stood, and then slowly fluttered down
towards the ground. The body which was wearing the hat had moved off yards away in just the
blink of an eye (about 0.2 seconds), and climbed on top of Asahina-san, grabbing her on the
forehead...
"Na-Na-Nagato-sa... KYAA!!!"
With a blank expression, Nagato ignored the pitiful screams of Asahina-san, her short hair waved
back and forth as she sat on top of Asahina-san.
"Wait a minute!" Haruhi quickly came to her senses.
"Yuki! You're a magician! You aren't supposed to be good at close-quarter combat according to
my script! Mud-wrestling in this place..."
Haruhi said that, and then shut her mouth. She thought for about three seconds then said,
"Ah, well, I guess this could do as well. It could be another selling point, right? Kyon! Record all
of this! This is Yuki's rare moment of glory!"
I don't think it's any moment of glory at all. She's just reacting out of instinct to counter the threat
caused by the contact lens. Asahina-san probably understood as well, but she couldn't help but
scream and shake her legs nonstop as a result of shock. I'm such a sick person. Now’s not the
time for me to stare at such scenery.
At this moment, a thudding noise was heard. Besides the two actresses, the others all turned and
looked behind.
The sound came from the pond fence opening where Haruhi leapt over and where we walked
through. The opening created by Nagato now revealed a large hole, the fence was cut into a Vshape
and fell outwards towards the road, as though it had been hit by an invisible laser.
I turned my eyes back to the scene of crime, and saw Nagato biting Asahina-san's wrist like an
anemic vampire.
"I was careless,"
Nagato surprisingly said, as though she had made a mistake,
"I had originally allowed the laser to disperse without causing harm to humans, but this time the
beam was composed of hyper-vibration particles..."
She said all of this in one single breath. Koizumi handed her the hat he picked up on the ground
and said,
"Something like optic fiber? But this sort of particle blade is invisible and weightless, right?"
Nagato received the hat and promptly placed it on her head and said,
"I sensed a tiny amount of mass, about ten to the power of negative forty-one grams."
"Even smaller than neutrons?"
Nagato said nothing and only looked at Asahina-san's eye, the waitress's right eye was still silver
in color.
"Umm..."
Asahina-san rubbed her bitten wrist and asked in a frightened voice,
"What did you just inject into my body...?"
The tip of the pointed hat tilted five centimeters forward. For me, that's a sign of Nagato looking
troubled. Maybe she was thinking of how to convey this properly. As expected, Nagato then
said,
"By alternating the dimensional vibration periods, a gravitational field can then be created on the
surface of the object."
Looks like she's trying very hard to explain this difficult to understand fact. While I can
understand that she has probably nullified the invisible killer beams, what I can't understand is
how the other two seem to be able to get what she had just said. Koizumi said, "I see, so the
tremors are caused by gravity?" He was asking questions that didn't seem to be relevant at all.
Nagato probably thought so as well, since she remained silent.
Koizumi shrugged his shoulders as though it was his trademark gesture,
"But we really were careless, I guess I should take partial responsibility as well. I always thought
that eyes could only fire laser beams. Could it really fire anything as Suzumiya-san has
described, as long as it's out of this world? It sure is impossible to catch up with Suzumiya-san's
way of thinking, I'm amazed."
There's no way we could catch up, she has run far ahead of the whole human race by three whole
rounds. I could even feel her coming back behind me now, though when I look carefully, it's as
though she's running in the same circle, giving one the illusion that she hasn't run forward at all,
which is exactly what she is good at. And that's not all, only those of us who were forced to run
on this circular track with her could understand this feeling.
The reason why Haruhi runs so fast is that she doesn't care whether the track is an S-shaped track
or a crisscrossed three-dimensional track, she just would have charged forward without thinking.
Not to mention, she's fitted with a compressed engine, meaning that she could go on forever. She
can quickly make up rules that are just impossible to follow, no matter how much one wants to,
and she, herself, doesn't realize that this isn't a real race. She is just simply beyond control.
"It's not too bad," Koizumi said, "We'll let the local authorities take the blame for neglecting to
maintain the quality of the fence, I'm sure people will buy this story. What's important is that no
one was hurt."
I took a peek at the pale face hiding under the wide-rimmed hat. Just a moment ago I saw a huge
gash on Nagato's palm as though she had just grabbed a sickle with her bare hands. How I'd like
to show this to the troublemaker, though that gash has now been healed as though it had never
existed.
I looked at the second group standing not far from us. Haruhi and the three extras were now
looking at the video on the camera, and then they screamed... sorry, it was only Tsuruya-san that
screamed.
"What should we do? I have a feeling something terrible will happen if we keep on filming."
"But we can't just stop here. If we refuse to comply, what do you think Suzumiya-san would
do?"
"She'd go ballistic."
"I think so as well. Even if she didn't go ballistic herself, I'm sure the 'Avatars' would in the
Sealed Dimension."
Stop reminding me of that horrible place again. I don't want to go there again, and I don't want to
do that ever again.
"Perhaps Suzumiya-san is happy with how things are now. She's making her own movie using
her own imagination, and her every move is like that of a god. You should know as well, she's
very frustrated at how reality doesn't conform to her way of thinking. Though she doesn't show it
on the outside, since she isn't aware of it herself, the end result is the same. However, in the
movie world, the story moves according to her wishes, so anything is possible. Suzumiya-san is
trying to create another world using movies as a medium."
As expected from a self-centered person, unless she has a certain amount of money and power,
it's near impossible to have everything go her way. She might as well become a politician.
As I switched through various frowning faces, Koizumi kept smiling and continued,
"Of course, Suzumiya-san is not aware of all of this. Since the beginning she has been creating
this fictional world, which shows how much passion she has with this movie. I think she may be
a bit too passionate, and she has unwittingly affected the real world as a result."
As with dice having only negative points, no matter how much you throw, you'll still lose in the
end. The longer this movie goes on, the more Haruhi will go out of control, but it’s a worse idea
to have her give up on this project, so I'll pick the lesser of two evils.
"If I have no choice but to throw the dice, then I would choose to go on throwing."
And why is that?
"Because I'm tired of destroying 'Avatars' already... Just kidding… Sorry about that. Anyway,
compared to allowing the world to be rebuilt all over, our chances of survival would be higher if
we allow some minor changes to occur to this world."
You mean a world where Asahina-san would become someone like Wonder Woman?
"This time, the changes are small in scale compared with the appearance of 'Avatars'. And
Nagato-san would place remedy measures for us, so it's not that much of a problem, right? Don't
you think that solving these paranormal events one at a time is a better alternative than trying to
save the world from being recreated from scratch?"
It's still problematic no matter which way you look at it. How about ambushing Haruhi from
behind and knocking her unconscious until the school festival?
"That would be too unimaginable. If you're willing to take responsibility for that, then I won't
stop you."
"Holding the fate of the world alone would be too heavy for my shoulders,"
I replied and looked at Asahina-san, who was picking the dirt off her waitress uniform with her
fingers. Seems like she's pretty much given up, but when she noticed I was looking at her, she
said urgently,
"Oh, please don't worry about me, I'm all right. I'll think of a way to endure this..."
She's just too adorable, though she doesn't look well at all. She probably has to face the prospect
of getting bitten by Nagato every time something happens. Though the teeth-marks would
disappear after a while, it's just uncomfortable getting bitten by her because, if Nagato were to
carry a sickle instead of a magic wand in that costume, then she would be like the thirteenth
Tarot card - Death. Either that, or she would be an ageless space vampire. Just being bitten by
someone in that costume is enough to send one's soul to the other world.
Even though Asahina-san was dragged into all this against her will, for a time traveler from the
future, she sure lacks a sense of danger. Or maybe it's because she never really told me what she
really thought about this, since her world is full of classified restrictions.
Forget it. I'm sure she'll tell me eventually. How I hope we’ll be in a narrow space together when
she does that.
It was finally time for Taniguchi and Kunikida, as well as Tsuruya-san to make their first
appearance.
Haruhi announced the roles they would be playing in the movie; it was long ago decided the
three of them would be small fry characters. They would be playing "humans who have been
turned into mindless zombies by the evil alien magician".
"In other words," Haruhi said with a disquieting smile, "as Mikuru represents the side of justice,
there's no way she would lay a finger on innocent civilians, and Yuki has taken advantage of that
weakness. She has controlled these humans using hypnosis, and Mikuru will end up getting
badly beaten, as she is unable to strike back at the humans that attack her."
I thought to myself, Just how much more do you want to torture Asahina-san? Haruhi then said,
“You guys will start by pushing Mikuru into the pond."
"EH!?"
Only Asahina-san yelled in terror, while Tsuruya-san giggled uncontrollably. Taniguchi and
Kunikida exchanged glances with each other, then looked at Asahina-san with very troubled
expressions.
"Hey,"
Taniguchi asked with a half-smiling face,
"Push her into the pond? The weather may be warm, but it's autumn already! As for the water
quality, no matter how you look at it, it just doesn't look clean."
"Su-Su-Suzumiya-san, we should at least find a warm indoor pool or something..."
Asahina-san also protested with all her strength, her eyes were close to tears. Even Kunikida
sided with Asahina-san.
"She's right! What'll happen if this is a bottomless swamp? She won't be able to float back up
once she falls in. And look, there're a lot of black bass swimming around in there."
Stop saying stuff that'll make Asahina-san faint! But from past experience, the more one resists,
the more stubborn Haruhi would get. She gave a very Haruhi-like response,
"Silence! Listen up! Sacrifices need to be made for the sake of realism. I had originally wanted
to shoot this scene with the Loch Ness Monster! But we lack the time and budget to do that. It is
our mission as humans to create the best stuff under limited time and resources, so we have no
choice but to use this pond instead."
What sort of logic is that!? Do you intend to have Asahina-san drown anyway? Can't you
substitute this with other backgrounds?
As I was considering whether to join the argument as well, someone patted me on the shoulder
from behind. I turned and saw Koizumi smile and shake his head quietly. I knew. I knew if
Haruhi didn't have her way, something queer might happen. If Asahina-san ends up spitting out
plasma, the Self-Defense Force might have to consider her as a hostile being.
"I-I-I'll do it!"
Asahina-san announced with a very mournful expression, she was beyond despair now. A poor
girl has decided to sacrifice herself for world peace. Things have developed to a stage where it is
no longer possible to stop. But this is probably the most climatic moment of the movie, right? I'd
better record this on film.
Haruhi was absolutely delighted,
"Well done, Mikuru-chan! You look awesome right now! That's the SOS Brigade member that
I've chosen! How you've grown!"
I don't think this has anything to do with growing up, but the result of learning from past
experience.
"Now then, you two over there hold Mikuru-chan's arms, Tsuruya-san, you grab her legs.
Prepare yourselves, once I make the command, toss her into the pond with all your might."
The following scene ensued under Haruhi's direction.
The three minions start by standing in a neat row in front of Nagato, when the black mage waved
her wand, they would lower their heads as though making a prayer in a Shinto shrine. Nagato
waved her wand like a priest waving away bad spirits with a blank expression, in a way, she
looked just like a shrine maiden.
Then, after receiving Nagato's psychic waves, the three minions started to move stiffly towards
Asahina-san as though they were zombies seeking living flesh.
"I'm sorry, Mikuru, I don't want to do this. But I can't control myself, I'm really sorry."
Tsuruya-san said looking very happy as she walked towards the waitress. Taniguchi, who would
cower in the event of an emergency, had no idea what to say, while Kunikida scratched his head
as he walked towards Asahina-san, who was looking increasingly pale.
"You two idiots over there! Be serious!"
You're the idiot around here! I took back what I was about to say and continued to roll the
camera. Asahina-san slowly backed up towards the edge of the pond looking terrified.
"Prepare to die~~."
Tsuruya-san happily pushed Asahina-san down and grabbed the sides of her long fleshy legs.
How should I put this? This sight looks way too dangerous.
"Kyaa..."
Asahina-san looked really scared, as Taniguchi and Kunikida grabbed hold of her arms.
"W... wait a moment, I still... I-Is this necessary?"
Ignoring Asahina-san's cries, Haruhi nodded her head and said,
"This is for making the best scene, it's all for art!"
Sounds nice, but how does this crappy movie have anything to do with art!?
Haruhi gave her command,
"Ready! NOW!"
Splash! Water foams splashed out from the surface, disturbing the aquatic life living in the pond.
"Ah... Help... Wah..."
This drowning act is just too realistic, Asahina-san. No, wait... How come it looks as though
she's really drowning?
"My legs... Can't reach... Kya...!"
It was fortunate that this isn't the Amazon River, or she would be an ideal target for piranhas,
shaking the surface of the water so frantically like that. I wonder if black bass attack humans? I
thought as I looked through the camera lens. It was now I realized it wasn't just Asahina-san
splashing the water.
"Argh! I've swallowed water!"
Taniguchi was also drowning. He probably tossed Asahina-san too strongly and fell into the
pond himself as well. I decided to ignore this idiot.
"What's that moron doing?"
Haruhi came to the same conclusion as I had. Ignoring the moron, she pointed the loudspeaker
towards Koizumi.
"Koizumi-kun, it's your turn to appear! Go and save Mikuru!"
The male lead, who was responsible for the lighting since the beginning, gave an elegant smile
and handed the reflector board over to Nagato. He then walked to the side of the pond and stuck
out his hand.
"Grab my hand. Calm down, make sure you don't pull me down as well."
Like a victim of a shipwreck, Asahina-san grabbed tightly onto Koizumi's arm like a piece of
wooden plank. Koizumi casually pulled the completely soaked battle waitress up from the water.
He then supported her by holding tight onto her. Hey! You're holding her too closely!
"Are you okay?"
"...Uuuu... Cold..."
As a result of being soaked wet by water, the tight waitress uniform was now even more tightly
wrapped around Asahina-san's body. If I were a member of the Motion Picture Association, I
wouldn't hesitate to give this movie a R-15 rating. To be honest, I have a feeling we might get
arrested for this.
"Yes, perfect."
Haruhi slapped the loudspeaker loudly and gave a sigh of satisfaction. Not paying any attention
to Taniguchi, who was still splashing the water, I pushed down the "stop" button on the camera.
We now had enough junk to open a stall, yet there was not a single towel to be found. Just what's
going on?
Asahina-san let Tsuruya-san wipe her face with a handkerchief as she kept her eyes shut. I held
my breath as I stood by Haruhi, who was studying the taped footage with a serious look.
"Hmm, not bad."
After watching Asahina-san fall into the water three times, Haruhi nodded and continued,
"Not a bad scene for the male and female protagonist to meet for the first time. Itsuki and Mikuru
have perfectly conveyed that shy, clumsy feeling. Excellent."
Oh really? Koizumi looked ordinary to me in that scene.
"We'll go to the next scene, where after rescuing Mikuru, Itsuki decides to hide her in his house.
The next scene will start there."
Wouldn't that disrupt the continuity of the story? Where did Nagato run off to after controlling
Taniguchi and the others? What about the zombies then? How were they beaten off? Even
though they're just minions, if their whereabouts aren't properly accounted for, the audience
won't buy the story.
"You sure are annoying! People are going to guess what happened anyway even if that scene
wasn't filmed! We can just skip the unimportant bits!"
Damn it! You mean all this time you just wanted to film Asahina-san being thrown into the
water!?
As I was about to respond, Tsuruya-san raised her hand and said,
"Um, Mikuru might catch a cold, so can I bring her to my place so she can get changed? My
house is just nearby."
"That's excellent!" Haruhi said to Tsuruya-san with glittering eyes,
"Can I borrow Tsuruya-san's room? I'd like to film a scene where Itsuki and Mikuru get intimate
together. This is going too smoothly! This movie is going to be a great success!"
For someone who prefers things to be convenient, things have been going smoothly for Haruhi.
Yet I can't cast away a doubt in my mind - I suspect Tsuruya-san knew Haruhi had wanted to
film such a scene before making that suggestion. As Haruhi had cast Tsuruya-san as a minion, I
believe Tsuruya-san should be a normal person like us, but...
"What about us?"
Kunikida asked. Taniguchi stood aside trembling while wrapping himself with his wet jacket.
"You can go home now."
Haruhi announced coldly.
"Good job. See ya, we'll probably not need you again."
And so, the names and existence of these two classmates disappeared from Haruhi's
consciousness. Without looking at the stunned Kunikida and Taniguchi, who shook his wet hair
like a dog, Haruhi appointed Tsuruya-san as our guide and walked off in large strides. You two
sure are lucky, no longer needing to endure any more disasters. For Haruhi, you're probably as
useful as a used BB bullet. You can't get any more fortunate than that.
For some reason, Tsuruya-san yelled happily,
"All right~~! Everybody, this way!"
She went to the front of the entourage and waved a flag.
Haruhi's unruly behavior didn't begin yesterday. I believe she was born that way. In fact, in five
hundred years, they'll probably have legends about Haruhi proclaiming to be the only one
honored by Heaven and Earth the moment she was born, but that's another story.
I don't know when it began, but Tsuruya-san seems to get along very well with Haruhi, as they
walk together in front of the group, singing the chorus of Bryan Adams' "18 Till I Die". Walking
behind them, I feel very ashamed for knowing them.
Nagato, the black mage, trailed silently behind them, followed by Koizumi, the lighting
coordinator as well as male lead. Neither seems too concerned. You two should learn from
Asahina-san, hanging down her shoulders and lowering her head slightly. And at least help me
carry some of the equipment, we've been climbing the slope all this time and I'm beginning to
understand the feeling of those racing horses trained to run uphill.
"And we've arrived! This is my home!"
Tsuruya-san shouted and stopped outside a residence. Her voice is impressive, even her house
was impressive. Sorry, I meant extravagant. I couldn't see the whole house from the entrance, so
I had no idea how big it was, but it was enough for me to call this house big. There was hardly
any other houses to be seen from the main entrance, which means it was quite a distance from
the main entrance to the nearest neighboring house. I took a look around and noticed that the
estate was surrounded by a huge wall, like those samurai-class mansions. Just what sort of
criminal activities was she involved in order to live in such a big house?
"Come on in!"
Haruhi and Nagato didn't seem to have any concept of common manners, as they stepped into the
house as though it were their own. Asahina-san seems to have come here before, as she doesn't
look at all awed, while being pushed inwards by Tsuruya-san.
"Such a nostalgic looking house. Such an incredibly well built structure. So this is what they call
buildings with a sense of architecture? Quite a contemporary building."
Koizumi said in an exclamatory tone, without carrying any expression on his face. Are you a
property salesman?
We walked through a vast space large enough to play baseball in, and then came to the entrance
hall. After taking Asahina-san to the bathroom, Tsuruya-san then led us to her room.
My room was like a bed for a kitty cat compared with this room. We were led into a wide
Japanese-style bedroom. The room was so wide I didn't know where to sit, but it seemed I was
the only one troubled by that. Nagato, Koizumi and even Haruhi didn't seem to look concerned.
"Such a great room. We could even film an outdoor shoot in here. Right, this will be set as
Koizumi-kun's room then. We'll film a scene of Koizumi-kun and Mikuru-chan getting intimate
here."
Haruhi sat on the cushion and examined the room through her fingers, which were crossed into a
rectangle. The layout of Tsuruya-san's room was simple, a simple Japanese-style bedroom with
just a tatami and a stove.
I followed Nagato's example and sat with my knees bent, but I couldn't take it after three
minutes, and had to release my legs. Haruhi sat with her legs crossed since the beginning and
whispered into Tsuruya-san's ear.
"Hee hee! Ah, now that'll be fun! Hold on!"
Tsuruya-san left the room carrying a very loud and pleasant laugh.
I kept thinking, Is Tsuruya-san really a normal person? To be able to get along happily with
Haruhi, one must either be extremely queer or literally from out of this world. But it's also
possible that they just struck chords with each other.
After waiting for a few minutes, Tsuruya-san returned. The present she brought along was
Asahina-san, and it's not just a normal Asahina-san, but an Asahina-san who had just taken a
bath. She was wearing what was possibly Tsuruya-san's loose T-shirt. How should I say this?
She was "only" wearing the T-shirt.
"Ah... S-Sorry to have kept everyone waiting..."
Asahina-san said, her hair still looked wet while her skin was bright red as she shyly hid behind
Tsuruya-san when entering the room, and then squirmed tightly as she sat down. The shirt and
the sleeves were just too long for Asahina-san, instead of calling it a T-shirt, a one-piece dress
would be a better description. This only served to enhance her charm. The contact lens in her
right eye, which she forgot to remove, continued to glow in a silver color, causing me to be
alarmed for a while. Though it seems it would no longer be able to fire any beams or rays, so I
was relieved. I really wanted to place Nagato, who was still wearing her pointed-hat and
kneeling, into a Shinto temple and worship her.
"Help yourselves."
Tsuruya-san placed a tray on the tatami, which contained some glasses filled with an orange
liquid. Asahina-san gulped half of the glass that Tsuruya-san handed to her. She probably lost
quite a lot of water, as she had worked the hardest today.
I gratefully enjoyed my fruit juice, whereas Haruhi finished hers in one gulp, and while spinning
the ice inside the glass, said,
"Well, since we have the opportunity, let's do the filming in this room!"
Without any rest, filming began at once starting with the following.
Koizumi carried Asahina-san, who pretended to be asleep, into the room. For some reason, even
the futon was prepared. Koizumi gently laid Asahina-san down and watched her face intently.
Asahina-san's face was flushed bright red as her eyelids trembled incessantly. Carefully and
slowly Koizumi placed a blanket over a defenseless Asahina-san, then sat by her side crossing
his arms.
"Um..." Asahina-san murmured in her sleep, Koizumi began to smile as he watched her the
whole time.
Nagato, who probably didn't need to appear, was sitting behind me and Tsuruya-san and was still
sipping her juice with a straw. Through the viewing panel, I slowly enlarged the image of
Asahina-san's sleeping face. As Haruhi didn't make any directions, I was free to indulge in my
own fantasies for now. Though Haruhi constantly gave commands to the two actors out there.
"Mikuru-chan, get up slowly, and slowly recite what I just told you."
"...Um."
Asahina-san gradually opened her eyes, and looked at Koizumi with eyes that seemed oddly
warm.
"You've awakened?" Koizumi said.
"Yes... Where am I...?"
"This is my house."
Struggling to move her upper body, Asahina-san's face looked conspicuously hot as her gaze
wandered around the air. She looked notably seductive; was that part of her acting?
"Th... Thank you..."
Haruhi quickly ordered,
"Yes, that's it! Put your faces closer to each other! Mikuru-chan, close your eyes. Koizumi-kun,
place your hands on Mikuru-chan's shoulders. It's fine, just push her down and kiss her!"
Asahina-san had her mouth half-open looking perplexed, while Koizumi followed Haruhi's
instructions and placed his hands on Asahina-san's shoulders. My patience was already at its
limit,
"Hold it! The plot's way too simplified. Why must we have this scene? What on earth is this?"
"A scene where boy meets girl! A romantic scene! This scene is necessary for a movie about
time-travel."
Are you an idiot? Do you think this is some prime time two-hour drama shown every week? You
too, Koizumi, what are you working so hard for? If this scene ever gets shown, your shoe locker
will be filled with hundreds of letters cursing you the next day, use your brain for a bit.
"Hee hee, Mikuru-chan's acting... funny…"
It's not funny at all… I had wanted to say, but something was definitely wrong with Asahina-san.
She's been looking so dreamy ever since the filming had begun. Her eyes looked teary, while her
cheeks were red, and she didn't even resist when Koizumi grabbed her by the shoulders. It wasn't
funny at all.
"Umm... Koizumi-kun, my head feels heavy..."
Asahina-san mumbled and trembled at the same time. I began to suspect whether she'd been
drugged. I naturally turned my gaze to her empty glass, and found Tsuruya-san giggling and said,
"Sorry about that. I added a bit of Tequila into Mikuru's juice. I was told that a bit of alcohol
enhances the realism in acting."
So this was Haruhi's plan all along? I was beyond stunned, and was close to going ballistic. How
could you sneak such a thing into her drink?
"Does it really matter? Mikuru-chan looks really sexy right now. This makes things even more
exciting." Haruhi said.
This no longer has anything to do with anyone's acting. Asahina-san was already shaking to and
fro and looking dizzy. Her face was bright red under her closed eyes. Of course it was good that
she looked sexy, but I didn't like the sight of her leaning onto Koizumi like that.
"Koizumi-kun, don't worry, just go ahead and kiss her. On the lips, of course!"
You can't do that! How could you do this to someone that's semi-conscious?
"KOIZUMI STOP!"
Koizumi went into deep thought, thinking whether to listen to the director or cameraman. I'm
seriously going to beat you up, you bastard! At any rate, I put down the camera, since I refuse to
shoot this scene, and I won't be forced into doing it either.
"Director, this burden is too heavy for me. Besides, Asahina-san seems to have reached her
limit."
"...I'm fine."
Asahina-san said, but she didn't look fine at all.
"Really, you're hopeless."
Haruhi scowled and walked towards the drunken girl,
"Huh? You're still wearing that contact lens? You should take it off for now!"
She smacked the back of Asahina-san's head hardly.
"O... OUCH!" Asahina-san shook her head and yelled.
"Mikuru-chan, this won't do! When your head gets smacked, you should let your contact lens fly
out at once. Let's practice again."
Smack!
"It hurts!"
Smack!
"...KYAA!" Asahina-san shut her eyes tightly.
"STOP IT, YOU IDIOT!" I quickly grabbed Haruhi's hand and stopped her. "What kind of
practice is this? This isn't a circus! What's so fun about this?"
"What now? Don't try to stop me. I planned this long ago!"
"Nobody planned this with you! It isn't funny! This is ridiculous! Asahina-san isn't your toy!"
"Well I've decided, Mikuru-chan is my toy!"
After hearing this, I could feel blood charging up to my brain, I even thought my vision was
going red. I was infuriated, suddenly my impulse overrode my reasoning, and I made a
subconscious reflex reaction.
Someone grabbed my wrist. I noticed Koizumi had closed his eyes and was slowly shaking his
head. When I saw Koizumi holding my hand, I realized I had clutched my right fist and was
about to strike at Haruhi.
"What the...?"
Haruhi's eyes flashed brightly like a constellation of stars as she stared coldly at me,
"If you have a problem, then say it! All you need to do is just follow my orders anyway! I'm the
commander and director... In any case, I won't allow you to stand up against me!"
My eyes went red again. You stupid girl! Koizumi let go of me! I don't care if it's an animal or a
person, but anyone who won't learn deserves to be taught a lesson, even if it means using my
fists. Otherwise she'll continue to repel people as though she has spikes on her back, hurting
everyone for her whole life.
I don't care if it's an animal or a person, but anyone who won't learn deserves to be taught a lesson, even
if it means using my fists.
"No... stop!"
Asahina-san quickly ran over, and said, nearly incomprehensibly,
"You can't! You mustn't fight..."
Standing between me and Haruhi, Asahina-san slumped to the ground with her face all red. She
grabbed Haruhi's knees and said,
"Um... Please get along well with each other... or... we'll be..."
Asahina-san said ambiguously, then slumped wearily to the ground closing her eyes, and then
began to snore quietly as she fell asleep.
As I walked down the slope with Koizumi, we came across the pond where we were filming just
a little while ago.
As the female lead had fallen unconscious, filming had to be stopped. Koizumi, Nagato and I
decided to let Tsuruya-san take care of the sleeping Asahina-san while we would excuse
ourselves. For some reason, Haruhi said she wanted to stay behind, and snatched the camera
from my hand and turned around quickly. I remained silent as well and quickly carried the large
amount of equipment out as Tsuruya-san led us to the door.
"I'm sorry, Kyon-kun,"
Tsuruya-san said apologetically, she then smiled again,
"I got too carried away as well! Don't worry about Mikuru, I'll send her home later, or she could
stay here for the night."
Nagato walked away the moment she stepped out of the door, as if she had no comment at all.
Nagato's probably like that all the time, she never has any comment for anything.
We now walked shoulder to shoulder on the way home. After about five minutes of silence,
Koizumi finally spoke,
"I've always thought you were a calm person."
I had thought so as well.
"Our world has already started to become erratic. I must ask you to please stop doing things that
could cause a Sealed Dimension to appear."
That's not up to me to deal with! Isn't that what your 'Organization' has been created for? You
guys should be doing something!
"Regarding the incident just now, Suzumiya-san seems to have subconsciously controlled
herself, and there has not been any sight of a Sealed Dimension being created. This is just my
request, but please make up with her tomorrow."
What I do is my own business. This isn't something that can be settled by me agreeing to do what
you say.
"What we should consider now is how to deal with the parts of the reality that she has affected."
Koizumi was obviously trying to change the subject. I decided to go along,
"There's no point considering, I really don't care about what things have become."
"It's very simple. Every time Suzumiya-san thinks up something, reality changes as well. Hasn't
it always been like that?"
Images of blue giants creating havoc in a gray world appeared in my mind.
"When Suzumiya-san gives an opinion on something, we should act upon it. Our mission should
be to find out the underlying motivation."
I also recalled some glowing red spheres. Koizumi walked slowly while saying confidently,
"We are basically the sedatives for Suzumiya-san's mental state, we're also her mental
stabilizers."
"That's... your business, right?"
"It is yours as well."
The mysterious ex-transfer student still gave me his never-ending smile,
"Our responsibility lies within the Sealed Dimension, while yours lies in the outside world,
because you are the only one who can keep Suzumiya-san's mental state stable and prevent the
appearance of Sealed Dimensions. Thanks to you, for the past six months, I have been able to
work less. Perhaps I should thank you properly."
"Don't mention it."
"Really? That would save me a lot of talking."
Coming out of the slope and into the main road, Koizumi once again broke his silence,
"Ah yes, I'd like you to come with me to a place."
"What if I don't want to?"
"It won't take long. Besides, you don't have to do anything there. Of course, you won't be invited
into a Sealed Dimension again."
Koizumi suddenly raised his hand, and a familiar black taxi stopped in front of us.
"Now let us continue,"
Koizumi said as he leaned against the back seat of the taxi, while I looked at the back of the
driver's head.
"Right now it has become a regular routine for us to be involved with Suzumiya-san and you.
Along with the other brigade members, it has become customary for us to tackle Suzumiya-san's
out of control behavior by physically countering them."
"What a bother."
"Maybe! But I don't know how long this routine can last, since repeating the same things over
and over again is one of the things Suzumiya-san hates most."
She seems to enjoy herself pretty much right now. Koizumi gave a smile that lacked any sense of
urgency and said,
"We need to find a way to contain Suzumiya-san's out of control behavior within the confines of
the movie."
To become a baseball player, one needs to start by swinging a bat and practice running; to
become a master Go or Shougi player, one needs to start by memorizing the Go and Shougi
rules; to get first place in the term-end exams, one would have a chance if they spent the whole
night studying the reference books. In other words, different people may use different methods to
succeed, but it all depends on effort. But, just how much effort is needed in order to remove the
destructive factors within Haruhi's brain?
If I tried to stop her, she would become upset, and those hateful gray worlds might start
reproducing like mad; but if I let her have her way all the time, her fantasies might just come
true.
Both methods were very extreme no matter how you look at it, couldn't she have a more
moderate attitude to things? Geez… She wouldn't be named Suzumiya Haruhi if she did things in
moderation.
Outside the car, the scenery became greener as the taxi drove onto a meandering hill road. I
understood at once. This was the hill that we passed by while on the bus yesterday.
A while later, the taxi stopped by the empty parking lot, which was mainly used by people
visiting the shrine. It was here, yesterday, that Haruhi had committed the atrocity of shooting the
shrine priest and the pigeons with her gun. It was that shrine again. Now that's strange. Today's
Sunday… There should be more people around.
Getting out of the taxi first, Koizumi said,
"Do you still remember what Suzumiya-san said yesterday?"
How am I supposed to remember every single piece of nonsense that she’s spouted out?
"You'll remember when we get there, to the inside of the shrine, that is." Koizumi then added,
"It's been like this since this morning."
We climbed up the stone-paved stairs. We have climbed these stairs before, yesterday. At the end
of the stairs would be a torii (Shrine Gateway), and then a stone path leading to the shrine itself.
On the path would be lots of pigeons...
"..." I was speechless.
There were indeed pigeons all over the path, birds that pecked at the ground while moving
around like a mobile carpet, but I wasn't sure if these pigeons were the same as the ones from
yesterday.
That’s because every pigeon's feathers had become pure white in color...
"...Did someone dye their feathers?"
...Overnight.
"These white feathers are genuinely grown from their bodies. They were not dyed, and they were
not caused by the colors running off either."
Maybe someone brought a lot of white pigeons and used them to replace the pigeons from
yesterday?
"How is this possible? Who would do such a thing?"
I was only trying to guess, yet I knew what the answer was, but I really didn't want to say it.
Yesterday Haruhi had said,
If possible, I'd prefer all the pigeons to be white, but I guess I can't be picky now.
Seems like she was already being picky!
"Exactly. This is likely created by Suzumiya-san subconsciously. It was fortunate enough that
there was a margin of error of just one day before the effects became apparent."
Maybe they thought we were going to feed them? The swarming pigeons gathered under our
feet. Besides us, there were no other visitors.
"Suzumiya-san's out of control behavior is slowly seeping out from the making of the movie,
into reality."
Wasn't it enough making Asahina-san fire lasers and beams from her eye?
"Why can't we just shoot Haruhi with a tranquilizer dart and let her sleep till the end of the
school festival?"
Koizumi responded to my suggestion with an ironic smile,
"It's a possible solution, but are you willing to take responsibility of what happens after she has
woken up?"
"No thanks."
That certainly wasn't included in my job description. Koizumi shrugged his shoulders and said,
"So what should we do?"
"Isn't she a god? You worshippers ought to do something!"
Koizumi intentionally gave a surprised look,
"You say Suzumiya-san is a god? Who told you that?"
"You of course!"
"Oh, did I?"
I feel like beating the crap out of this guy.
Koizumi dodged this with his usual response, "Just kidding," and then said,
"In fact, I don't think there's a problem classifying Suzumiya-san as 'God.' Half of the
'Organization' has indeed treated her as a 'God.' Of course, there are doubters. Personally, I,
myself, am skeptical as well. Because I believe that if she were a god, then it would not be
possible for her to live in this world without being self-aware. Generally speaking, a creator
should be someone watching over us from someplace afar, making miracles randomly, while
calmly observing us panic over them."
I knelt down, picked up a feather dropped by one of the pigeons, and spun it with my finger
while remaining kneeling down. The pigeons started to rumble again, sorry guys, I didn't bring
any breadcrumbs with me today.
"This is what I think,"
Koizumi continued to ramble on,
"Someone granted Suzumiya-san omnipotent god-like powers, yet they did not allow her to
become aware of it. If there were a God, then Suzumiya-san would be the person chosen by God.
But no matter how you look at it, she's just a normal person."
I didn't have to think a lot on whether that girl's a normal person or not. But why did Haruhi have
such omnipotent power that she's unaware of? Enough power to turn pigeon feathers white.
Why? Who was behind this?
"Well, I also don't know, do you?"
He's seriously asking for a beating.
"I'm sorry," Koizumi said and then continued,
"Suzumiya-san is a creator as well as a destroyer. The reality right now may be a failed product
of creation, and perhaps Suzumiya-san was given the mission to amend this flawed world."
Go on!
"If that's the case, then we're the ones at fault. Suzumiya-san would be the normal one, while we
would become enemies of this world by getting in her way. That's not all. Besides Suzumiya-san,
the whole human race would be at fault."
Yep, now that'd be a major problem.
"The problem lies with us who are at fault. When the world is fully amended, will we still be a
part of that world? Or will we be considered as defects and get eliminated? This is something
that no one can predict."
If you can't predict, then quit bullshitting as if you know everything.
"Yet from a certain perspective, so far, she has been unable to create a perfect world, and that is
a fact. This is because her consciousness is leaning towards that of creation. Suzumiya-san is a
very positive person, but what would happen if she suddenly became negative?"
This doesn't seem like the time to remain silent, so I gave up,
"What's going to happen?"
"I don't know. But no matter what, destroying is always easier than creating. 'If I don't believe in
this, then let it disappear!' If Suzumiya-san held such an attitude, then all would be reduced to
naught, and everything would be eliminated. For example, if a formidable enemy were to appear
before us, as long as Suzumiya-san denies their existence, then that is enough to destroy them.
Be it magic or highly advanced technology, she would be able do away with them very easily."
But Haruhi hasn't denied everything. Is it because she still has hope in something?
"That is what we are concerned about."
Koizumi continued without looking concerned at all,
"I think there's no way we could ever find out whether Suzumiya-san is God or a similar
omnipotent being, but there's one thing we can be sure of. If she continues to freely use her
powers and it leads to the world being changed, it's possible no one would even realize that the
world had changed. The scary thing is, even Suzumiya-san doesn't realize when the world has
been altered."
"Why's that?"
"Because Suzumiya-san is a part of this world, proof that she isn't the creator of this world. If she
is a God who has created this world, she should be in a place outside of this world, yet here she
is living with us in this world. We can only conclude that she can only alter the world to a certain
extent, and this is unnatural and very strange."
"You look even stranger to me."
Ignoring my comment, Koizumi continued,
"I still prefer this world that I'm living in now. There may be all sorts of conflicts between
various societies, but it's only a matter of time before humans get these problems sorted out. The
problem lies with theories like geocentrism. We need to make sure that Suzumiya-san doesn't
begin to believe in these ideas. Weren't you able to come out of that Sealed Dimension with
these preferences as well?"
How should I say this? I’ve forgotten about that, I decided to seal away the memories that I no
longer wish to remember.
A smile formed on Koizumi's mouth; it looked like a self-deprecating smile.
"I'm sorry. I've been talking too much about this unconstructive stuff as though I'm a defender of
this world's justice. Please do accept my apologies."
(Chapter 4 End)